It has been more than awhile since I've posted on my blog.

Life has been a rollercoaster ride & I've just been trying to hang on!! In July I had some major surgery & was hospitalized for about a month--since then, I've spent my days dealing with the ups & downs that come with the recuperation. Slowly but surely I am getting back on my feet, but the doctors were correct, it takes time. (more than I ever imagined.)

Thanks to the encouragement of a friend, aka Diana, I am back on the blog. I was told it doesn't matter if times were happy or sad, easy or difficult, because sharing is a part of the healing process!!!

These past few months I have been trying to get back on my feet. It has not been an easy task--it seems like doctor's appointments & tests are nothing but a weekly routine--but even as I am still fighting some health issues, I am in better shape than I was a few months ago & for that I am extremely grateful!

On the 13th of January I will begin classes. To say that I am excited to get back into a routine, to be out & about & meeting new people is an understatement. I have learned a lot of things about myself & life these past few months & one of them is that human beings need to have something to work towards, they need goals, & they need to feel productive, they need a purpose. One of my major struggles during my illness & recuperation was feeling as though I was not being productive, that I had no purpose. I went from being constantly busy & highly active to lying in a hospital bed for a month & being very limited when I finally left the hospital. It was tough to say the least. It demanded that I accept the limitations my body was giving me, to realize that I could not bounce back to my old self in a day! I still struggle daily with this, as my body is certainly no where near back to it's old self--but I am learning to process it all a bit better.

I do believe that getting back into classes & finding a job (a very tedious task) will be so mentally healing for me. It'll give a routine, it'll get me out of the house, & it'll give me something to focus on rather than focusing on not feeling well!

My family & friends have been an amazing support system through it all. They took shifts & were with me at the hospital day & night, they were my strength through the scary times, made me laugh when I was sad, & tried their best to remind me I didn't have to be doing something to have worth. *smile* Abby even came to slumber party all night with me in the hospital--she even took me on walks through the halls & demanded that I stood up straight & did another lap!! She's a tough cookie! I am so blessed with such awesome support from both my family & friends--who could ask for more? They are the reason I made it through--their love, faith, & prayers are what gave me the strength to keep fighting.

And the support is still there--encouraging me to rest when I need it, push harder when I start to give up, & most of all, convince me that just being me is enough. I'm still on the rollercoaster of health ups & downs--& it looks as though I will be for quite some, but the good news is that I truly feel ready for whatever lies ahead in 2009. I'm ready for classes, I'm ready to challenge my brain & am excited to see who I will meet along the way! You can never have too many people in your life to love!

So, thank you EVERYONE--for sticking with me when things were challenging & very scary, for loving me when I found it hard to love myself, & for pushing me further when I thought I couldn't take another step!

I promise to blog. I promise to come out of hibernation...& share the rollercoaster ride.

Here's to a NEW YEAR--whatever it may bring--I'm just grateful to have lived to see it (when I almost didn't.)

*Picture* Me, the day after surgery! Don't I just look beautiful? *ha* That NG tube really brings out my eyes, huh?